A woman was urged to take action after sharing a major family dilemma on social media.
Writing in a Mumsnet forum post which has since been deleted, a user under the handle whatdoido2022 alleged she recently discovered her husband’s ex-wife had been accessing her confidential medical records.
As a result, she was torn over whether to report the ex – who she happens to work alongside – or leave things be, despite the “major invasion” of her privacy.
While she appeared unsure over her next move, the sheer number of voices online slamming the ex’s behavior may have proven enough to convince her to report the matter.
Moving on after a divorce can be difficult, with licensed marriage and family therapist Gabrielle Applebury estimating it can take an average of four years to get over the pain associated with the dissolution of a marriage.
“As you build a relationship with someone, your brain creates neural connections that coincide with the relationship’s relevance, meaning that the more important someone is in your life, the more connections your brain will make associated with them,” she told Love to Know.
“Post divorce, these brain-based connections can take some time to reorganize.”
Yet the ability to separate oneself from those former connections can be complicated further by the presence of children.
That appears to be at least one mitigating factor in the story shared to Mumsnet. According to the post, her husband shares a 14-year-old son with his ex-wife.
It was the teen who first uncovered his mom’s actions, with the woman writing that her stepson revealed to her a few weeks ago that he “overheard” her telling a friend she had looked up her “hospital records.”
According to the post, both the woman and her husband’s ex work for the NHS in the U.K., and the ex has access to a variety of health care databases through her role as a clerk.
Just to be sure, however, she submitted a “subject access request” to find out if anyone had looked at her records. Sure enough, the results came back confirming her husband’s ex had accessed the records “4 times” and had even looked at sensitive “maternity” information.
That left the woman facing something of a quandary. If she reports the incident, the ex will likely lose her job in a development that would “obviously affect” her stepson and cause further family issues as the ex would likely discover it was her who reported it.
“I’m not sure what to do as it’s a complete invasion of my privacy and I have some very sensitive things in my record which only my husband knows,” the woman wrote.
But while she appeared divided on the subject, the response online was one of anger, with users calling on the woman to report the incident, labeling it an obvious “invasion of privacy.”
As a result, the forum post was subsequently withdrawn with Mumsnet confirming that the woman is now “going to report the breach of trust mentioned within the thread.”
Newsweek was not able to verify the details of the case.
If you have a similar family dilemma, let us know via email@example.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.
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